to start my book that you are about to read, that pic wasnt taken by me. however, i wasnt given the chance to take a pic of the above sign, so i felt the need to show you what you see when you are approaching downtown atlanta from the south. some of you have never been there, and yall need to see the goods! and yes, the billboard is real. jermaine dupre thought it was really necessary to purchase a billboard to claim the home of so so def records – a record label who hasnt put out a decent album since da brats funkdified in 1995.
ok…so, out of a 10-day vacation in georgia, i experienced a lot. i experienced more during this trip than i did during my 2-hour layover in the hartsfield-jackson atlanta airport back in 2002. back then, i only experienced the lovely smoking section of the airport, and its not one of the prettiest things about the state. however, i was a smoker, i had a layover and i needed a cigarette. so during my brief stay, i got to see the dirtest part of the dirty south: the airports smoking chamber. i call it a chamber bc its a huge room with no seats, electric sliding glass doors, the nastiest brown walls i have ever seen in my entire life, and a lot of smoke that comes out in clouds when the doors open.
but i digress. i am no longer a smoker and bc i am dating brandon, a very charming (and handsome!) gentleman, who just so happens to be from georgia, i was able to see more than meets the eye. or something…
kudzo: the plant that ate georgia. i am still fascinated by this stupid vine. i have no clue why, but it amazes me how much of the state is covered by a plant thats not even pretty. history says they brought over the vine from japan to prevent erosion. but they didnt know the plant grows 3 ft. a night and ended up spreading across the state like a prostitute on duty. covering everything in its path – trees, pastures, even houses!
now, dont think i got to spend every waking moment in atlanta bc i didnt. while brandon grew up in georgia, he grew up in a city about an hour northwest of atlanta – dallas. dallas, georgia aka paulding county. odd? yes. and his family still lives there, so needless to say, but i saw more of rural georgia than i have ever seen before.
while in dallas, georgia, one of the constants was every gas station being out of gas. (thanks, government.) we literally had to drive 30 minutes away from dallas in order to get gas. and if they had gas, there was either a long line to the pump (like 10 cars deep at each pump), or a limit on how much you could spend.
after searching for gas, we went to our first rugby game. while i still dont understand the game, it was still very interesting to watch. its very brutal, and i witnessed some dude ask his teammate to cut him directly under his eyeball in order to relieve the pressure from a hit during play.
the team brandons bff, fudge, is on ended up winning, so we decided to partake in a celebratory drink at the pub that sponsors them. while i dont have pictures of what im about to describe, it all really happened. rugby players are intense, and they really like to take their celebrations to extreme by doing the following: lighting their balls on fire, chugging beers to only let the loser drink out of someone elses shoe, challenging grandpas to chugging contests, making first-time scorers streak the bar at 4pm, slam beer mugs against one another, and sing numerous…NUMEROUS drinking songs. i walked away during the fire balls bc it was really gross.
we strolled around what deep ellum was 10 years ago – little 5 points. it was very surreal being in a completely different state, but experiencing something so similar to what i have experienced many years before.
then, the worst part of our trip happened – brandons moms car got sideswiped. WHILE IT WAS PARKED.
yes, parked. i swear it was totaled, but luckily the idiot was caught. that was our transportation for the week, but dont be so blue, panda bear! we ended up renting a car for a few days so we could still explore.
moving along.
we also traveled a little north of dallas to see the etowah indian mounds which are exactly what they are called, so ill spare you the pics. however, there was a really pretty river behind them where the injuns presumably fished, so we stopped to take a gander.
while we were at the mounds, i think i saw the biggest ant i have ever seen in my entire life – a cow ant. and this picture doesnt do it justice, but it was effing big. almost as big as my index finger.
then we ventured back into the big ol city.
walked around. got pan-handled a bit. walked over to centennial park. saw some stuff. saw some things. even went to the underground which was my favoritest place of all!
while that is not my pic up there, yall need to see what i am talking about! i wasnt allowed to take pics while at the underground. in fact, i was told to shove my camera further into my pocket, so no one could see it. hence why you get a visual from the lovely google images. when telling my dad that we went to the underground, he got excited and said, “that place is nice! i went there in 1984 and it had all these shops and restaurants underground and whatnot.” yes, dad. its a great concept and im sure it was quite lovely. quite lovely back in 1984! but now…now the underground is only good for purchasing the grill youve been wanting for your teeth or your 59fifty new era black on black ball cap with the georgia bulldogs logo embroidered on it.
i also had the best bbq in the world at fat matts rib shack. the meat just fell off the bones, and the bbq sauce was to die for. they even had a little blues band playing. and did you know that every place in georgia offers sweet tea? well, they do. which makes it hard for brandon to order tea with his meals here in texas bc he has to sweeten it himself.
meanwhile, back at the ranch, we read to a class of 1st graders. his sister, anna, teaches 1st grade and she asked brandon to read skippy john jones to her class. cutest reader on the block even though he didnt know how to hold the book so the kids could see the pictures at the same time he was reading.
the next day, we had some more bbq and went to a place in dallas called “high schoals”. theres usually a waterfall and stuff, but it was a little dry this time around.
did you know theres not an american atv association? well, theres not. and that allows me to do the following over and over in the country.
brandons dad decided it was necessary to make us go around their house several times to get riding the atv out of our systems. so, we told him that if we rode, then he needed to ride, and so he did. very proudly. showing off even.
yes, hes standing.
finally, the biggest part of our trip approached us, and we had to travel 4 hours north to tennessee. gatlinberg, tennessee aka the panama city beach of tennessee. need an airbrushed t-shirt with your loved ones name on it? they got it. need a pic in sepia of you and your significant other dressed up as people from the civil war? they got it. need to catch a quick fake bake session while filling up your car at the corner gas station? they got it.
mt. le conte is located in the smokies and hiking to the top of it was the most hiking i have ever done with so much elevation. i will now consider texas hikes to be faux-hikes as texas has nothing on mt. le conte. including the scenery. unless of course, you are comparing mt. le conte to el yunque in puerto rico – the rain forest. if thats the case, then le conte has nothing on el yunque.
now i would like to introduce you to one of the cutest, politest, funniest, sweetest (i could keep going) 2.5 year old little boy i have met in a long time – brandons cousin, sawyer.
while hiking, sawyer was nice enough to invite eri-ta (me) to play in the dirt during a break. we even played airplanes, stomped on stumps, ate candy, charged to get where we needed to get faster, and catapulted stuff at brandon with the “kickin horse” game. (a board game actually called buckaroo!)
by the time we started reaching higher elevation, sawyer obviously fell asleep in the backpack and the views were immaculate. never have i ever seen such spectacular views, and the day couldnt have been prettier.
several breaks, many moments where we were wondering when the hell this trail was ever going to end later, we finally made it 5.5 miles to the top – le conte lodge.
i have never been so excited for a cup of hot cocoa in my life. i was ready to keel over, but what i am about to show you makes it all worth it.
the most beautiful sunset evar. i have never seen a sunset before and brandon said this one was the best he has ever seen in his life, and im thankful. thankful that i got to experience such a beautiful part of nature.
now, up at the top of mt. le conte, theres no electricity, but theres running water. (and working toilets!) so if you are staying the night, you will spend it the way they probably spent it in the olden days: groups sitting in circles discussing their day via candle light, playing a guitar while the kids played some type of game until it was bedtime.
we were in bed by 9p. not bc its dark, but bc we were dead tired. 5.5 miles UP is a long way!
the next day was rainy and foggy. granted, were were in the smokies and the mornings are usually foggy, but it was exceptionally foggy this morning.
during our 6.5 mile hike down, there was much more scenery. and i swear the smokies have drugs laced in their clouds. there were numerous times where i felt like i was trippin. not like falling down trippin (thats later), but straight up hallucinations.
steep declines, lots of drop offs and many switchbacks later, anna, brandon and i got way ahead of the group and ended up getting to the bottom pretty quick. anna crossing paths with “A MONSTER” of course slowed us down a little, but not enough for the rest of the group to catch up. so we stopped at the bottom and took a little break.
and that was mt. le conte. that night, even though my ankles and knees were killing us, we felt like we deserved some beers. so we headed to the smokey mountain brewery in downtown gatlinberg, tn.
only to wake up the next day to very…veryveryvery sore legs causing us to walk around like penguins and a headache from hell. not only did i fall on my way down the mountain (friends, its an ericka trip, its gonna happen, ok?), but apparently youre supposed to drink massive amounts of water while hiking. on my way back to georgia, i had a near-death experience. i began willing out all of my personal belongings – anna got my ps2 even though she doesnt play video games so i told her to sell it on behalf of me, and brandons mom got all of my dvds. i came back to life, when the demons exited through my mouth. thanks, bojangles fast food chain for making me realize what you fry your potato things in bc cleveland, tn now has my dna.
our last night in georgia, we decided to go watch the mighty georgia bulldogs play bama. we wont discuss the score, just know that i had some great ettoufee and listened to some dude play his guitar with a tape player playing his background music. dude was good, but his setup was odd.
and to close our 10-day vacation, we couldnt have asked for a more perfect closure than meeting herschel walker who was on our plane back to dallas! and if you dont know who herschel walker is, then you are dead to me.
see the excitement in our faces after meeting him! hopefully, ill get to go back again.